The trains

Quite unbelievable really. There was I strolling down to the station this morning whistling a happy tune in time for the 7:54. I walk the ramp, turn onto the playform and see the train departing. Oh well I say, as I glance up at the indicator board. 7:52 is says. Hold on!!!! 7:52!!!! Fcuk that ... the bleedin train has left early. Typical that ... bleedin typical.

I happen to watch Question Time last night. One of the panelists was Stephen Green from Christian Voice. Now, I am not very religious, but can understand peoples wants and needs to worship. But the performance from Mr Green was a complete eyeopener to me. He began each answer with a quote from "The Sciptures" and bawbled on about Christian Values ad nausium. Christian Values yeah right. I've had a quick look on the Question Time web page to see some of the posters views on Mr Green. They are split ... from coments such as,

I thought the treatment of Stephen Green was a complete disgrace. Janet Street-Porter was particularly irritating. I switched off. To see a Christian figure ridiculed in such a manner made my blood boil. Jon, Bristol and

Stephen Green's performance this evening only serves to demonstrate how some factions of Christian leadership are so disconnected from society, and perhaps the gospel message, they are not able to reach out to those in need. The message is LOVE.Ash Rust, Bristol.

Well there you go, I don't get it myself .... but praise be.

Well we have the Spudz tomorrow and it's going to be one of them matches. I've got that feeling in my water.

My tune of the day: Two Sides to Every Story - Loleatta Holloway

Wild and wacky

Not me today. I have a stinking cold. Sniffling, coughing, spluttering it's not good. Thinking back I haven't had a cold for over two years. I'm not sure what has changed this year? I may have to spend this weekend with some Cold n'flu and a nightnurse. My PJ's came out last night.

There was a security alert at Canon Street tube this morning and you could see the panic in peoples eye. As the Station guy shouted for everyone to evacuate, there was that split second of blind panic, women and children first my a$$. I hoopped onto a Circle Line train ad got out of dodge.

Old Kerry spotted a big fat woman this morning with her staff pass on, a massive ruck sack and she was walking along reading and she thought of me! It's nice to know I create an impression. I bet the book was Harry Potter!!!!

I watched a Def Jam comedy DVD last night and would say I was disappointed.If anyone has seen the The Original Kings of Comedy then you would realise how good this could or maybe should have been. But it wasn't. It even had Dolomite - Rudy Ray Moore doing the same old routine at the end. Oh well, I'll have enough laughs on Saturday when the Charlton play the Spudz.

I was going to do some housework this weekend ... don't make me laugh.

My tune of the day: Can you see where I'm coming from - Instant Funk

Fish and Chips

So we were held up at London Bridge for one hour twenty minutes last night. Someone had thrown themselves under a train at New Cross. I had got on at Charing Cross and it was meant to sail through LB. But we stopped and they opened the doors. You then had everyone try and get on before asking where the train was going. I ended up whistling and singing songs.

There were two people reading books and walking along this morning. Both over London Bridge, and given the fact that it was quite chocker it amazes me. I was tempted to tie my shoe laces.

I have the start of a cold. I have been sniffling for a few hours now. I should go get some Vitamin C. Oh, I had Sugar Puffs for my breakfast.

By the time I got home last night, I couldn't be bothered to cook, so ended up with Fish n'chips. I always end up with a dry piece of fish and cold chips. Mushy Peas rock.

I also ended up watching a DVD of Cedric the Entertainer. Now I would have to say his stand up routine is good.

There seems to be a plethora of Charlton blogs starting up. Oh Andy Hunt over in Belize even has one, and it's deffo worth a read. It's also all gone tits up for Charlton sponsors Allsports. They owe the club loads and have been called a Chav Shopping Chain in the Sun. That's like Genghis Khan calling Hitler a trouble maker. I say get rid of them now, get a new sponsor, put them on the front of the shirt and sell the new one at a discounted rate ... say twenty squids. Job done.

My tune of the day: Purple Rain - Prince

Brighter days ...

So the trains were packed and people wouldn't move down. They just stand there as though I a daze. I'm ok jack, move down you must be 'avin a bubble.

Why is it that only fat middle aged women smoke. Have you noticed as soon as you get in to Cannon Street they all light up. Then they waft them about.

I was listening to an old skool mix this morning. Julia Roberts "Caught in the middle" and stuff. I was feelin' all my 27 years.

So over a third of women have been sexually assaulted after being drunk!!!! Hmmm ... KEV?????

My tune of the day: Tears - Nu Colours

Wemberlee ...

It's a place in North London and they call it wemberlee!!!

We sang the other night when the Monkey Hangers were in town. Yep this will be our year ... until we got drawn away to Chelsea in the next round. Move on ...

So a Dandy Murphy double gave us another 3 points on Saturday. I watched Men watching football and was happy when we went two goals ahead. I was flicking between footie and Queer eye for the straight guy, and got a bit jumpy when the West Brom pulled a goal back, but hey let them eat cake. We are now happy in second with the Spudz up next week, it's all very strange I tell thee.

I had another lazy day yesterday. After getting in at 6am I slept til about noon. Then found myself on the sofa eating hula hoops and cheesy wotsits. I ended up watching Extreme Makeover, which wouldn't have been too bad if I hadn't just started eating a creme brulee. It's a strange old show because how some of these people let them get themselves into this state to start with is well, beyond me.

Oh and Welling are through to the next round of the FA Cup.

I watched some of the MOBO'S on friday night and would say that on TV it came across as a good hour show. But if you read the press it was shambolic, no food or free drink ... hmmm, no real stars, just the same old tired people. Well Victoria Newton of the Sun what do you know. Disastrous for what reason? Do you actually know who Luther Vandross was, and the reason behind the tribute? If you think that Kiss FM (How crap are they by the way) will come up with a great alternative you are quite delusional. David Beckham is up as a nominee in the Male Style category. Oh right, so he doesn't have a stylist or gets given all his clothes for free. He is to style what Kev is to humility.

My tune of the day: Creepin - Luther Vandross

Faith, hope and char-ideee

Well there goes another week. It's the end of summer, the nights are drawing in ... and everyone has got the hump. Ho hum I hear you sigh. I'll have to have some wine at lunchtime.

I think I need to have a complete tidyup in the flat. Yes, I say that once a month and never get round to it. But I need a kick up the backside to do it. Just get 100 black bin bags and crack on. It's a plan, but the chances of me doing it are .... well slim to none. I'll most ptobably end up lying on the sofa watching Be Cool and Cedric the Entertainer. I know how to move it.

There were a plethora of big bags on the train this morning. It must be a weekend thing. The paranoia over bags has definately been forgotten, another ho hum there.

I had a night out last night. Over in Shoreditch with the boys. I haven't seen G,Rod, Glen, Leo and H for a few months. Time does fly. But we hooked up and painted the town some shade of red last night. But we knew it was time to leave when in Herbal they played Under Mi Sleng Teng. Now I like a tune, but per-lease.

My tune of the day: Fantasy - Ten City

Banter

Oh and the girlie emails continue.

They have now got the 'ump with me as I got an email containing this ...

"I am shocked and appaulled, how rude, I mean this is the man who is harping on about it being the last day of 2005 he can wear flip flops and how his stupid alarm woke him up at 5.10 this morning (so there is a god) and he's putting us down for aving a chat - Well, what I say is CHEER UP YOU MISERABLE OLD SOD!!!! I hope that your train is delayed on the way home, that everyone is wearing their staff passes and that you get stuck next to someone who stinks and is fat and carrying a big bag! Oh and by the way the East London lot includes me and Nat and we are South London birds- GET IT RIGHT!

X"

Notice the kiss at the end ... that makes it A OK then ...

WOMEN ....

One of them days ...

You knew it was going to be when the alarm went off at ten past five. What's that all about? I set it for six thirty!!!!! I was sat down drinking tea before I realised.

At least the suns shinning, the sky is blue. I've been blaring out some new tunes this morning to try and cheer myself up, but as yet no luck.

The East London lot are bickering amongst themselves over email. I have been included on the email to list but I can't even be bothered to get into it with them. They are talking, as only girls can .... a load of old baloney.

I had an enjpyable evening over at Neil and Ellies. I saw their new daughter Naiomi for the first time. I have to admit I don't understand all this baby stuff. But hey ...!!!!

Luckily I didnt sit through the Man City and Donnie game. Apart from 5 minutes it looked pants. But then again that could have been Charlton, quite easily. We're in the hat so we'll just have to take what's given.

I'm led to believe that the nights are now longer than the days. That's all well and good, but doesn't allow me to wear flip flops without catching my death of cold. Today may be the last flip flop day this year. Sad times.

It's just dawnmed on me that I won't be at footie this weekend. I may just try and look round for a game to catch. Cray Wanderers or Bromley ... surely it can't be that bad!!!

My tune of the day: Foxy Brown - Willie Hutch

Hanging Monkeys for fun ....

Yep, those pesky kids were sent packing, their ball burst and their backsides well and truly spanked. Yea, we all knew it was going to happen. When Charlton were drawn out of the hat against Huddersfield, no, no .. er, er erm I mean Hartlepool it was a game we couldn't or wouldn't want to miss. Our first competitive outing against the boys from the NE, but another chance to get on the road to Wembley. We would turn up, spank them 3/4 nil and move on. No I didn,'t think so either. We went one nil down, phaffed around a bit but eventually with the exuberance of youth saw them off. All this for a tenner, and Grimsby beat the Spudz. Oh happy days.

I finally got the Sony Ericsson file manager thingy to work yesterday, so I could download some pics from my hols. It only took 2 weeks for me to figure out that the software was corrupt and that I should reload it. Cutting edge and all that.

I finally got a text off of Leafy Leigh telling me of the arrival of her baby girl. There was me waiting to find out, but not hearing anything. I didn't want to go charging in there size 9's akimbo, just incase. Then she says that she was sure that she had told me she had had a daughter ... called India. Well, I said I'm sure you hadn't. Women!!!!

The Office move is over and after doing it single handed, I was treated to a slap up at Lahore Kebab House. The lamb chops are to die for, and as for the Sag Gosht, well. Luckily I didn't over do it ... and if you believe that.

Also before I forget, I was saddened to hear of the death of Willie Hutch over the last few days. RIP Soul Brother.

My tune of the day: That's What Love Does - Vincent Montana Jr

Some holiday snaps

It's a flip-flop world ...

Yep I was there as the might of the Russian Army overran one of the smaller non confrontational independent states. They had more guns, bigger tanks, and it appeared that our smaller band of soldiers all had trench foot!!!!

As the second goal hit the back of the net, both myself and Danny Murphy shrugged our shoulders and knew that that was it. The future had been Orange, but now it was truely blue and gold!!!!!! They had killed the beautiful game. Pele would be turning in his grave if he was in one. The King is dead, long live the king.

Yes I know, a load of old bullshite really, but the moment Robben collapsed on the floor, grabbing the ball only for the imbecile in charge to wave play on you knew that that was it. What an excellent player that Robben is. He is quick, flight of feet but somewhere down the line that wasn't enough. He has been coached to fall on the floor at every opportunity. He fell in the box looking for a penalty, fell in the middlke of the park looking for a free kick in fact at every opportunity he fell over. Go on Robben you carry on.

But the one that got me ... the incident when Makelele deliberately impedede Romm as he was away.

Chgelsea you can kiss my ass ...

My tune of the day: Amazing Love - Anane

Powerade ...

I post something I think is topical, and no one bleedin' comments. Typical. I should have continued lamenting about cr-i-ckit.

I'm currently undertaking an office move on my own. Everyone lese has the day off, or is "working from home". I can smell a rat here. I've moved about 6 big filing cabinets, 4 printers, 4 PC's, 2 servers ... and there's still shed loads to do. I need a refreshing drink and a good lunch. I haven't even had time to read the paper. What's the price of petrol me asks?

I'm quite looking forward to the match tomorrow. But not that much.

My tune of the day: Buttercup - Carl Anderson

Death of the Metrosexual male ...

Righto, it seems death of the metrosexual male has been greatly exaggerated. Now supposedly we have the ubersexual. Yep, add doing housework and demanding in bed to the mix. It can't be true surely, we still have a way to go to educated the masses. If you have a gym membership, subscribe to a glossy male magazine, like to wear stylish (sometimes loud clothes), use a lot of "products", have a facial (still the best bit of pampering in my book), wear pink, you could be classed as a metrosexual male. If not then you most probably wear Northface, Stone Island, chunky jewelry and or a flat cap. No, that's not a Northern jib, because as Wendal says, even Northerners have the Internet, MTV and style mags. That's better than the Industrial Revolution.

Word on the street is that the Global Economy depends, no demands that men shop as much as women. That men buy these "products", that they like the lesser sex become subservient to advertising.

Just look at Kev, wearing stripy jumpers and drinking rose wine. Who would have thought in a few years back. How the mighty have fallen.

Somewhere out there, there is still the feeling that doing these things is girly. Say Seven, Eight years ago living your life like this would be unimaginable. Just look how Vince now highlights his hear, wears pink, moisturises. But then drinks horrible lager by the bucket load and wouldn't be seen dead near a gym. Sometimes you have to do it, or just leave it.

Talking about doing it or leaving it, I saw something last night that did make me chuckle. I went out for a bit of dinner with the lovely Natasha (she paid ;) and was stood at the bar. Some bloke saunters up and asks for two glasses of champagne. The barman looks at him and says ... "We don't sell champagne by the glass sir, only by the bottle". The bloke takes a step back. He looks worried. He stops, thinks ... "Hmmm he says, give me a second I'll just go and ask". The bloke then trots over to a nearby table and begins to talk to this girl sitting there.Now come on. Per-lease. If you're going to come out with your bo, and do the champagne thing ... either do it or just leave it.

My tune of the day: Saturdays - Alexander Hope

Chicken Legs ...

Some people are getting a tad annoyed that their new love for cricket is being questioned. The same people who have slagged it off now "love" it, as if. I bet they never had subbuteo cricket, or test match as a child ... or spent half of the 6 weeks school holiday trying to get your ball back from next door. That's why some people get pissed off. Because of all these jonny come latelies, if that's the way to spell it.

It appears that the Chelsea charged 48 squids for their match against Anderlecht last night. Yep, it's champions league, but per-lease. For that sort of money I'd have wanted Jose to come round my gaff and give me the tickets personally. But then again that's just me.

I'm just reading a quote regarding the spat that Rooney and Beckham had last week. Rooney called Becks a flash b*stard!!!!! Righto.

The trains where fcuked last night. There was a fatality on the 5:54 train to Sidcup. Yep I complain about the journeys, the trains the people, but they are never that bad.

I'm thinking of going organic ...

My tune of the day: Sadie (she smokes) - Joe Bataan feat. Jocelyn Brown

They're coming home ...

Well come on ... they never even leave these shores. I'm here giggling at all the fever surrounding NuCricket as I watch a bus ride through Central London. I even laughed at Richard Littlejohn this morning with his quote "You can always tell the game's up when dopey birds in replica shirts start latching on to sport, despite not having the faintest idea what's going on ..."

Come on. England won the Ashes. It's great for England, for cricket but I don't get what it's all about. They don't play cricket in schools, more people than not have told me it's a crap game, not interested, blah, blah. It's a great game. I saw Viv hit 200 in a day, Viv also steer the West Indies home against the Aussies at Lords in 83, Faoud Bacchus run out Geoff Miller from the boundary in 90 something. I even went down to Taunton with Big D and Don a few years ago to see Kent in the C&G. Given that Middlesex are my team, it was a great day out. Cricket is a great game, a great day or 5 days out if you please. Even KEV has got carried away. Now Kev is encased in Stockholm telling us how great Sweden is for Sport, life and luxury. But he becomes a true English gent when it suits him. Even up to the point of sending me a text last night at 11:30 saying, and I quote ...

" Viv Richards, Joel Garner, Andy Roberts, Malcolm Marshall, you took a hell of a beating"

Well I think England may just beat this team above. Given that Malcolm is no longer with us and Joel may have put on a bit of weight. But Kev, the West Indies have never played for the Ashes ... not even Ramadine and Valentine (Do you know who they are?)

It's just dawned on me that we are playing the Chels on Saturday. Don't you just hate the way they have bought the title. It's all a laugh though ain't it.

Life was a bit better on the trains today. Although some woman was stood in the aisle filling her nails. She was proper going for it. What's that all about?

My tune of the day: Give It Up - Eminence Feat. Kathy Brown

Chocolate Covered strawberries ....

Well that was the plan, but typically I got waylayed !!!!!!

I'm sitting here watching the cricket, and it appears it's going to be a very strained day. Warne just turned the ball 2.5 feet. That's a hell of a long way. But if England are going to win it they will have to do it on the pitch, the hard way. As it should be.

It's a funny old game this cricket. It's a great game, and I can sit there and watch 5 days of a test with no problem. Generally concensus is that Cricket is crap, it takes too long to play and is for old men. Now, we have it on the back pages and front pages. Freddie Flintoff is the new Jonny Wilkinson, and it's gone all trendy. Oh well, it's swings and roundabouts because England will be crap again in a few years and no one will be interested.

Did I tell you about my Chocolate covered strawberries? No!!!! Oh well. I went to Borough Market on Saturday. The intention was to get some nice food, have a little drink and check on WAP how Charlton were getting on.

(Warnes just got another wicket ...!!!!!)

Well, it started raining, Charlton went 1-0 up and I couldn't find chocolate for toffee. I got some strawerries, some blackberries, some figs but no Chocolate. There goes the best plans.

I had one of them trips to work today. It was overcast, it was a bit cold, the trains were packed and there were people kicking up a stink. One bloke got on at Lewisham and smelt of shite. I kid you not. I had to keep my mouth shut, and breath slowly through my nose. But bleedin' hell, some people should sort themselves out. There was also a bloke at London Bridge who was trying to get the biggest two bags onto a packed train. It just makes me laugh that he thought he could get in, plus his two bags onto a train with no room in it. There was another train along in a few minutes.

You can definately tell that Autumn is here. There's a chill in the air. It's not good, but the nights will be drawing in soon enough.

(Whooops Freddies just out ....)

I've decided I'm going to have to throw some of my clothes out. I've got too many. It'll hurt, but hey.

You wouldn't want to be Michael Vaughan at this moment ...

My tune of the day: Big Picture - Izzi Dunn

Hats off

I would have to say, it was a supurb performance from England in the firld today. Freddie and Hoggy were supurb.

Also Charlton won at Birmingham, and sit second in the table. You wouldn't believe it from any of the press coverage but sod em.

My tune of the day: A House is not a home - Luther Vandross

185 - 1

So Harmison has just got the first wicket. The Ashes are now dependent on the rain ... it's only cricket.

I'm a tad bored, but not as bored as some people ...

My tune of the day: Superficial People - Ten City

Carnival Pictures ...

Laughing in the face of adversity ...

I watched a bit of the news on the Katrina disaster last night. It was the first time I'd seen any of the news from a British point of view. It was quite an eyeopener and actually puts news reporting in context. I compare this to the 24/7 coverage on CNN. The news in the US can be quite critical and they do try and question what is actually going on. There was an interesting take on the Kanye West outburst where in the US they actually agreed with what he said. If they ever mentioned in over here it would be seen as pandering to this so called PC brigade. PC my ass.

An interesting day at the Oval yesterday. It has been amusing seeing the increase in Cricket in the media. It happened with Rugger now with the gentlemans game. So it's alright to sing Jerusalem, but not bang tin cans ... hypocrits.

So Curb It thinks I should get the train to Brum. I was thinking of wandering off to Borough Market instead to treat myself ... you decide.

My tune of the day: Runnin - Jon Cutler feat. Pete Simpson

Reality Check...

Yep, back at work and it's as though my holiday never happened. I've been trying to download some of the pics I took, but typically they are not loading up. I'll put them up when I can get the damn thing to work.

I stayed up and watched the England match last night. It surprises me that they get so much critisism!!!! Why? Because they aren't much cop are they? As a team they are, what you may call shite. Individually they have some quality. But please, all the hystrionics ... you'll be saying we'll (notice that Kev) win the Ashes next!!!!

I bought quite a lot of stuff on my hols. Tees, trainers, some jeans. The bag was creaking as I came home. I did get a fantastic Lionel Ritchie Fan Club teeshirt. I'll put a pic of that up soon too.

Thinking back it's been quite a hectic couple of weeks. I had the Metro City Weekender thingy with free drink on the bank holiday Saturday. Then there was the Carnival on the Sunday and the Monday. That was funny. I do actually need a weekend of relaxation. Lie back and watch men watching football tell me how our lot are getting on up in Brum. That should be interesting.

It's funny not having read the papers for over a week, or bothering to check on line. You realise how you don't need to read the Sun for a daily laugh. A reality check indeed.

My tune of the day: Wake up everybody - Teddy Pendergrass

Back in blighty ...

Well how knackered am I? But I've got to watch the England/ Ireland of the North match tonight. I'll be back on tomorrow, with some thoughts on Philly and NYC ...

Greetings from Philly

As I sit in the ING Internet Cafe having just diggested the biggest Tuna Melt the world has seen, my thoughts turn to nothing more important as what pair of trainers to buy next. Shopping in Philly is ... as they say awesome, and NY City is to come.

Anyway good luck to Franny Freshners up in Scoootland, and welcome the Booth-man.

My tune of the day: Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John (Get in there Glen ....)