Reality Check ...

No not the fact that Charlton are going to whoop Chelski this evening. Just the realisation that I have some bad habits. Like buying the Sun as my daily read. What a muppet!!!

On the day after Rosa Parks died, page 12 of the Metro, the S*n has a full page advert for the Klu Klux Klan. Totally unbelievable. It's the first time I've been down with the Scousers for a long time. You can keep this piece of trash.

Anyway, it's a sellout tonight. The Reds move over to West London on a roll. A cheese one at that. Hopefully we put up a good performance, but who knows. It's a funny old game.

It also seems like I did Palarse a favour yesterday. Galvinated them to become European Champions. Jeeez.

It's the Southport Weekender in just over a week. I can't believe it was a year ago that I was getting ready to go to Brazil. Unbelievable.

I need to get my car tuned. If anyone knows a good garage please let me know.

My tune of the day: Date with the rain - Eddie Kendricks

La, la, la ... la, la, la, la ... la

Take a good look at this fella here. Duleep Allirajah. Some sort of Sports Writer for a web based news thingy called Spiked Life. I would put a link in here, but per-lease they can do their own promoting. So whats so special about Duleep? Well nothing really, he could lose a few stone, do some more chin ups maybe ... and in the spare time between visits to the gym he could do a bit of research. He's written an article called "Offside" well it is about football, and the crux of the piece is, as he puts it ... One can only feel pity for a football club that nobody hates!!!! A club like Charlton Athletic, for instance. Nobody really dislikes Charlton. Look at how they are written about in the press. Charlton are always described as a 'well-run club'; a 'model of fiscal prudence'; a 'family club', a club 'rooted in the community', and so on. Charlton fans would love to be loathed like Millwall, but nobody has any strong feelings about them. Somewhat pathetically, Charlton fans have attempted to contrive a rivalry with Crystal Palace but their animosity goes largely unrequited. Palace fans reserve their real hatred for Brighton and Hove Albion, a hostility undimmed by the fact that the two teams have played only two competitive games in the past 15 years.

Well there you go. We all want to be hated. We all want to be Millwall, or to have a rivalry like Palarse and Brighton. Yes Duleep we do. Charlton fans have attempted to contrive a rivalry. Yes sir, we have. NOT!!!!

The funny thing is he harps on about Brighton, and HATE ... and how we rejoiced in Palrse going down last season, but then says ... and I quote "But is it sufficient to forge the kind of bitter rivalry that the Addicks crave? Even though Palace chairman Simon Jordan described the Charlton fans as 'morons' for revelling in his team's relegation, most Palace fans steadfastly refused to express any animosity towards Charlton. Extremely irritated, yes, but hatred? Sorry chaps, but we don't care that much."

Notice the WE don't care that much!!! Well sonny Jim do you know why we care. Because of the time we had to play second fiddle at your shite little ground. We shared the poxy place, we took the flack off you. We took it on the chin, we stood up to be counted, we wouldn't back down ... that's why you muppet. I don't HATE Palarse. I pity them. The Middle Class Croydonite Nigels, living in a concrete jungle wanting to live in South London. Jordan doesn't help. He typifies Palace all mouth and no substance. I remember there being someone on the Palarse message board who called himself Anti-Addick. It seems he didn't care, and that showed when CIFC actually played Palarse in a supporters game of football. They won't play us anymore!!!!

So Duleep, Jordan, Kid Jensen, Jo Brand, Sean Hughes, Bouncebackability you can all kiss my a$$.

My tune of the day: 'We've sent the Palace down' to the tune of 'Is this the way to Amarillo?'

For whom the bells toll ...

I have to say, I never heard that bell ring once on Saturday evening. I was laying back watching the Pompey/ Charlton match from the comfort of my own sofa. It's my sofa so I'll do what I want on it. There was no close up of that Pompey tatooed bloke, no bell ... I was a wee bit worried. Given that Pompey went one nil up and we were playing shite I had reason to be worried. Inspector Spector making hid debut was not living up to expectations, and Kish and Smerts weren't giving Murphy protection. Then I switched over to X Factor. Saw how crap that was, how crap Chico was and turned back. The turning point. I'd prefer to watch some crap I was actually into. Two sparkling goals later and we lie second. You can stick your wacky penalty where the sun shines. Martinique by all accounts.

I had a stroll around Greenwich on Sunday. I haven't been there in months. Nothing changes much apart from the centre market being a bit shoddy. Not like it was in my day.

I had a dabble in cooking roasted veg on Sunday as well. Yes, it's easy ... but I wanted to try something a bit different ... quality, absoluet quality. I'll have to use that as my entertaining meal ... if you get my drift.

I also watched SIN CITY yesterday. A bit different, but oh so much better than Jades Salon. Easily pleased me.

It's pishing down somewhat. Not nice.

My tune of the day: Don't Let It Show On Your Face - Adeva

Ruddie who ... ??

Brummies that's who. A good manners survey revealed that peeps from Birmingham are the rudest, peeps from the Toon are the most polite and that Londoners came in 5th behind Cardiff and Exeter. Sod that I say ... the Readers Digest poll states that women are more polite than men, the North are more polite than the South and something else about white van drivers. I ask you ... Readers Digest!!!!

It's X Factor tomorrow and I would say I tried not not to comment about last weeks fiasco. Chico who I would say was the worst ever contestant on the final show was saved and some girl group wasn't. They were both crap, but please Chico was so crap it was embarrassing. I think I may have been able to sing a tune better than him, as long as it was something about Benny Fenton and Theo Foley.

I see old Philip Green gave himself dividends of over a billion pounds. I hope Mr Mooley got his share if Phil was dishing it out. The fat womens shop has never had it so good.

It was raining so hard this morning I put on a big coat and carried an umbrella. Now the sun is out I think I may sweat on the way home. That surely calls for a few beers. I may have to look on ebay for a mac.

My Mum phoned up this morning to say she was going to Portsmouth for the weekend. Given that Charlton are playing there I was a tad confused and thought she had started following the Addicks away. No she's off to see some of the Trafalgar celebration stuff. So my Mum is in the place Charlton are playing, I will be staying in doors maybe catching the match op Sky ... strange ... how times have changed.

My tune of the day: - Why Do Fools Fall In Love - Frankie Lymon

It's just like watching Brazil ...

Or not as the case may be!!!

I was unfortunate to put the radio on this morning and had forgotten I was tuned into Talksport. Brazil and that other muppet (Graham Beecroft I've since learnt) were chatting about how Scotland has second highest murder rate in Europe , and in fact it showed that more than 2000 Scots are attacked every week - almost 10 times the official police figures - and are three times more likely to be victims of violent assault than in America. Fairs fair you may say ... a bit of news on the tardy station. Wonders will never cease. Then Brazil opened his cake ol'. That's because we don't like foreigners he said!!!! We don't like them coming over. Hang on a minute. So the Scots murder foreigners that come over there, taking their jobs and shagging their women. But isn't Brazil a Scot living in England. Well East Anglia at least. He's been over 'ere earning a decent living. Somewhere I seemed to have missed his point. Or maybe I've just reiterated what I already know. Why the hell do I listen to Talksport. James Whale, Mike Dickin, Mike Parry even bleedin Rodney Marsh!!!!! These people are so well off the mark it's embarrassing. Or maybe they are not so far off the mark, that's why Jamie Oliver in his new Channel Four show last night asked the question why in the UK is fast food greasy burgers from a dodgy stall – but in Continental Europe you can eat like kings as you buy their weekly groceries, delicacies like artichoke, fresh salads with olives and ripe tomatoes and fillets of fried fish. Maybe it's the I don't like foreign muck complex as they tuck into a curry.

I see Kevin Lisbie is back in action for the Addicks. He scored in the ressies, so he'll be on the bench come Saturday.

The trains were a bit crap this morning. Delays, overcrowded ... a normal morning. But we had Mr Sweary and his mobile phone to contend with. F this, F that ... what would his dear old Mum have said.

My tune of the day: Spasticus (Autisticus) - Ian Dury And The Blockheads

Let it all blow ...

I never can understand why people walk around carry Next bags. Yes, I get the recycling bit, but Next!!!! Per-lease. I believed that I had never gone in a Next shop, but was dismayed to find that a few years ago I went in a Next in the Trafford Centre. It must have been a mad Northern moment. There's nothing in Next for me. But I still don't get the bag thing.

It's been raining like a rainy thing.

Just had a cheese salad sandwich. How boring is that? It's fish n'chips with mushy peas tonight. Cup of tea time.

Welling United won again last night to go up to third in the table.A lofty height indeed.

My tune of the day: The Greatest Love - George Benson

The Beautiful Game ...

Well Pele or Edson Arantes do Nascimento as he is know in South London would have been chomping on his viagra tablets last night. The game he played with skill, beauty and flare was given the old heave ho by Messrs Coleman and Curbo. If I saw one long ball I saw twenty five, if I saw one foot in I saw ten feet out, in, out ... in, out Kishishev definately shook it all about.

There was a difference of opinion on the old pink oboe list:

> I think Fulham played us very well and never really allowed our game to flow. We had some good attacking moves in the first half but my perception was that we were lucky not to be 0-3 down at half time the chances we gave them.

> As for Hughes .... he's our Owen Hargreaves.

> The first half was very open and a good game to watch and I thought we were unlucky to be a goal down. I thought Jerome was the weak link today and had one of his worst games, so it was very disapointing not to have Ambrose on the bench to replace him when he finally went off. I got the impression that we went to 4-4-2 at that stage and, as in other games this season, that was the catalyst for our game to suffer and the last thirty minutes was fairly tedious.

> I begin to wonder if the management's plan is STILL just staying up. I think that most Charlton supporters would say that the club has moved on from this. Or has it?

> Disappointing,Frustrating, typical Charlton...... Tonight had it all very disappointing we let two points slip away but happy to take the point in a game we could have lost just as easy. Did not think we got much luck or run of the ball and when Chris Perry gets a elbow in the face and a pen is not given you know its going to be a long night.

Well I have to sit somehwere in the middle of all these comments. Yes it was typical, it was frustrating, but it's Charlton. We don't become world beaters just like that. The most worrying aspect is Chris Powell. I think the end is nie for the Legend. Chris was all over the place last night, continually giving the ball away and not being able to stay on his feet. I think Chris may have come into the club, fairly fitter than a few of the other players. He was able to hit the ground running, and was back to his best in the first couple of games. Now that most players are at a fair level of fitness his age, slowness are beginning to show. What with Konchesky being able to play left back at West Sham, and being touted as a fill in for Ashley Cole have we missed out here?

As for Kish, he got boo'ed a bit last night and there was a bit of cheering when he got substituted. Now I'm not one to boo players, and if peeps were booing Kish, it's out of order. But I do think the booing/ cheering was actually aimed at Curbs for not doing it earlier.

My tune of the day: Breathe - Jerome Pinder

The Guildford three

Well it was three quid actually. I bought a ticket on Saturday at Hither Green. As there were no humans available I had to buy a ticket using the machine. So a cheap day return to Guildford with a Gold Card was paid for, £7.45. When I got to Waterloo and stood with Claire and Poppy as they got their ticket, I was surprised to find their ticket cost £4.45. Quality, absolute quality. So I was overcharged for the priviledge. It may be £3 but it's the bleedin principle. I will be heading over to get my £3 back this evening.

So we went to Guildford. Stopped for some Vodka and then sat and watched Hedwig and the Angry Inch. All very interesting if you could make out what the "Rock Opera" was about? It passed over my head at great speed. Nandoes was packed when we came out so ended up in Burger King ... oh the life, the life fantastic.

I would have to say that the rest of the weekend was spent in Sofa heaven.

It's football tonight. The return of Claus. We all know he will put in a blinding tackle tonight, oh well maybe not but will be instrumental in all of Foolhams good play. It's been over 2 weeks since we last played so it will be interesting to see the shape of things. Will Bothroyd get a berth on the bench? Will Herman be back?

It was a horrible morning. Autumn is here. The leaves have fallen off the trees. It's all downhill to Christmas.

My tune of the day: I declare War - Double Exposure

Four ...

How comes everyone owns them great big golf umbrellas? They are not big and not clever. Well they are big, but you know what I mean.

It appears that Petey Crouch got boo'ed on Wednesday against the Poles. A bit weird that, I'm not a great fan but I wouldn't boo.

Autumn is here in full effect. The leaves are falling off the tree's, the rain is pouring down and there is mud everywhere. Half of London is being dug up and its turned into Mudlarck City.

I was just thinking that I went for a job in Kentish Town a few years back. Kentish Town is on the Northern Line. The Northern Line is fcuked. How would I have got to work? Bus!!!??? Yeah right. I would have been in a right old pickle. Lucky that I live in South London then, where the trains are so nice.

I watched Question Time last night, and tried to see past the David Cameron Show. Whether he's puffed a joint or supped on the crack pipe. Who knows!!!! Do we want to know? Are you bothered?

I watched some of the 6 day test this morning. I can't see the point myself, but I'm sure Bernie will be glued.

Are there more people smelling on Garlic on the trains on a friday? There just seems to be. People were reeking this morning.

Should you have beans and tinned tomatoes together, or separate? Does gravy really go on chips? Has anyone ever had a pickled egg sensation?

Roll on this weekend ... I need to chill.

My tune of the day: The Glow of Love - Change

Just like that ...

We're gonna win the World Cup. We can see it now, we'll beat Brazil 3-1 in the Final and Becks will be lifting the trophy. Not the Jules Rimet one that Bobby lifted but that new one. Yes, indeed ... I can see it now.

Call me an old romantic, but wouldn't England winning the World Cup be great? No!!! What will hapen is all the Chavs will be out. Women will be saying they have always liked Soccer. There will be an open top bus parade around Luton, with Gazza getting his "tits" out again. Oh what fun. Peter Crouch will be the golden shoe winner. Luke Young will be in the World XI, and Sven will become a Sir. Crack on I say.

I caught a glimpse of the match last night but turned it off when Crouch came on for Wright-Philips. Sod that.

I had one of them nights. I woke with a start at 8:00 am this morning. Given that my alarm should or would have gone off at 6:45 am I must have slept through it. No tea or tiffen for me this morning.

It's been a busy old week. Working late, not having time to eat properly, it's all a bit sad really. Can't wait for the weekend.

Mr T has spurned the chance to appear on I'm a Celebrity. Fool.

My tune of the day: Acid Poke - Adaonis

TV Farce

So the TV licence is going up from £127 to £180 by 2013!!!!!! Hang on. That's 8 years. Yes, it's 2.3% above inflation but hey in comparison to the Council Tax, PAYE/ NI and every other tax it's a bargain.

I had a night in eating pie and mash and watching Love Soup. I then had an early night, and was only interupted by a 2:30am call of nature.

It's now raining, so my plan on doing a bit of shopping will have to wait. I may have to go home and watch a load of blokes running round. Not good.

It's just dawned on me I'm off to the theatre on saturday. Over to Guildford to see Hedwig and the Angry Inch. I'm not too sure what it's about but Claire said it is supurb. Hopefully there will be dinner when I get home. I say hopefully.

I was just thinking, I usually spend my Saturdays watching the sublime, so is this Saturday the ridiculous?

I actually need a holiday.

My tune of the day: It's time to think about it - David Moore ft Leandra

Too much salt ...

In Wayne Rooneys diet. Or so they say.

It's been one of them days. I can't believe its' quarter to four!!! I started at dawns crack this morning and haven't stopped.

I may treat myself tonight ... if you get me.

It was interesting to read peeps thoughts on Lewisham. Mooley said it was like Barnsley!!! He jests. Barnsley is like Udderssfield, is like Oldham, is like Grimsby. All of these places were visited watching the might Addicks back in the day. But it ws the QPR game that I wore bondage trousers and the Oxford game that I wore a full length fur coat. It was Villa that I went dressed as a Pearly King, but that's a different story.

We did have a laugh back in the day. When I got David Whytes autograph at Port Vale, and Jean took our pic, you should have seen the look on his face. At Barnsley we asked Mark Bright how Hatty was, and had a bottle of wine outside a Waitrose in Reading.

My tune of the day: Free Love - Juliet Roberts

The World at our feet ....

So they've gone and qualified. Luckily Holland beat the Czech Republic and that sealed a slot. There does seem to be about 100 teams in next years World Cup, so we should be greatful. I would say that on current form we'd be hard pressed to beat Togo, Iran and the Isle of Man. Peter Crouch, supposedly he had a good game ... but I say in comparison to whom?

I headed down to Brighton on friday night. The Thameslink train took an hour and I got picked up from the station. A quick change and straight out on the Chocolate Martini's. It was a night called "Where love lives" in a club under the Hilton. A good night.

I met my Mum for lunch on Saturday afternoon and had a few more Chocolate Martinis back in a bar called Heist. I was then lucky that Claires fella, Stewie was driving back to London ... so I jumped in with him.

Saturday night, I popped into the Vanburgh to see Mr and Mrs Graham who are off to Canada at some point this week. I have linked to his blog over there on the right ... the Rocky Mountain one. It was good to see some old faces, PQ of course ... you can't get any older, Kev, who is now single but still in Stockholm, Sarge with Mrs Sarge and the usual motley crew. A very strange experience really because I'd have to say it was quite a rowdy affair and not like a leaving type thingy at all. The chances are that if G stays in Canada we may never see him again. I presume he'll be back for the odd Charlton game etc, but you get my drift. All very weird. Gerry mantioned that I had been chatting to his Mrs on MSN thinking it was him. Phew is all I can say.

I read a bit of Grahams blog and was interested in his take on Lewisham. He says and I quote ...

" afterwards it was down to Lewisham to get some new contact lenses, Lewisham is a strange place - some lovely Victorianhouses, a dull shopping centre & a constant underscore of violence & menace "

Hmmm, underscore of violence and menace. For whom I wonder??? I for one think there's more an underlying menace in places like Bexleyheath, Sidcup and Dratford than Lewisham. But it's a different perspective, it's a different take on how one fits in. Ho hum.

My tune of the day: Here's to you - Metropolis ft the Sweethearts

Hello .....

My tee shirt of choice ...

So Sven is going to play Peter Crouch!!!! I'd prefer him to play Lionel ...

My tune of the day: Brick House - The Commodores

My tee shirt ...

 

Feedback

So peeps didnt like my questionaire .... sod ya then Burkett.

You are what you eat!!!!

What is a Twixter?
A: A playground con artist, adept at winning pocket money poker games
B: A person between 20 and 30 years old, with no proper job, who still lives with their parents
C: Someone who can't function at work without a chocolate snack at 4pm each afternoon

Question 2
Shoegazing is:
A: The act of coveting a pair of Manolos, when you're already over your credit limit
B: A style of rock music with a dreamy, blurred sound
C: A state of paralysing social embarrassment

Question 3
Bluesnarfing is:
A: The craze for swimming in a cage surrounded by sharks
B: The practice of recording cover versions of old Jazz standards
C: The use of Bluetooth wireless technology to steal other people's private computer data

Question 4
Your latest Bling is pronounced Braff. Translate into conventional English:
A: Your jewellery is worthless
B: Your jewellery is priceless
C: Your girlfriend/boyfriend is very good looking

Question 5
Sudoku is:
A: An almost inedible Japanese fish
B: An almost insoluble Japanese number puzzle
C: An almost undetectable Japanese earth tremor

Question 6
What's a Chelsea Tractor?
A: The last word in combine harvester technology
B: A four-wheel drive car more likely to be found on the school run in London than driving cross country
C: A red double-decker bus

Question 7
Chuddies are:
A: The sort of elderly ladies who use an umbrella as an offensive weapon
B: Underwear - in Indian slang
C: A threat to the fabric of society

Question 8
An American offers you a bunch of Dead Presidents. Do you:
A: Suspect they're working undercover for the drugs squad
B: Call the murder squad immediately
C: Wonder where they got all that folding money from

Question 9
Tapping up is:
A: A common ruse employed by cowboy plumbers, to overcharge for fixing a washer
B: What publicans do when they change a beer barrel
C: A undercover approach to line someone up for a new job - apparently illegal in Premiership football

Question 10
Podcasting is:
A: Making the tough decision to throw out your garden centre mistakes
B: The art of putting together the ultimate playlist for your i-Pod
C: Digital radio programmes which can be downloaded onto your i-Pod

My tune of the day: Sitting Pretty - First Choice

Moans and groans ...

I just had a quick look at wether the Blackwall Tunnel is still closed at weekends!!! Surprise, surprise. It's been going on for how long?

My Ipod didn't work, now it does ... I should be happy? Until it doesn't work again!!!!

My Conservatory roof has a leak. I'll have to get up there to mastik it!!! Great.

My First Aid cabinet fell of the wall, hitting me on the head. Doh!!!!

The car is misfiring, and the dashboard light doesn't work. Winters here.

I need a holiday.

My tune of the day: (Where you bee) All my life - Eddie Holman

Let them eat cake ...

So Djibril Cisse slapped a cocky 15 year old who did that crap Tim Lovejoy pull your hand away shaky thing. Tim Lovejoy and Soccer AM ... it's football anyway not SOCCER, have a lot to answer for. That shite Easy, easy chant that seems to be doing the rounds at every ground. Bleedin' Chip, he deserved a slap anyway, he was most probably Northern. Given that Lovejoy comes from Herts he is a glorified Chelsea fan, and he gets on my goat.

On another note David Beckham says Peter Crouch can become Englands new "Mr Big!!!!!". Crouchy as he is known is pushing for a starting place on Saturday. Well there you go. The beautiful game ... compromised by a walking bamboo pole. We'd be better off playing Sol Campbell up front on Saturday, or Philip Neville. Chances are these two would get in, infront of Darren Bent anyway. England for the World Cup my a$$.

My email has been playing up for two days ...

My tune of the day: Come on In - Moment of Truth

Fair weathered friends

I actually left my phone at home on Saturday. It was a mistake on my part, but when I did eventually get home, I had 10 missed calls and 14 texts. All from gloating Spudz fans wanting to give it. You know give me some grief given that Charlton are to Spurs what David was to Goliath. My mother always says that I should be a Spudz fan. Given that we lived in Seven Sisters and that if we'd have stayed in North London they would be where I would have hung my scarf. Thank FCUK for that. The abuse that they dished out to "Our" Darren when he was forced off the pitch with a head injury was criminal. When you see the pictures on MotD of Darren celebrating his second goal there is a group of Spudz fools giving him the bird in the background. Somewhere I missed that bit of history. But anyway, they beat us ... so we should move on.

But before I do, I just have to say that our lack of playmanship and little niggley fouls ia also criminal. If Davids pulled one shirt he pulled 20. He broke the play up when a player got away from him. That's the way to do it, nothing overly blatant but just enough to stop the Spudz charging from one end of the pitch to the other and then scoring what would be the winning goal. Surely if Chrissy Powell or one of the Midfielders had just pulled a man back and taken a yellow we wouldn't have conceeded that third. I'd get my Sunday team to do it, so why Charlton can't work it out is ... well!!!!!!

I had to have some retail therapy yesterday. I was in a proper stinker of a mood, so bought some new jeans. I then spent 4 hours ironing as I watched Finding Neverland on DVD. Quite a nice film.

My Ipods not working. I was warned that it's crap ... but you never learn.

My tune of the day: Cry my eyes out - Bunny Sigler

 

 

 

The trains

Quite unbelievable really. There was I strolling down to the station this morning whistling a happy tune in time for the 7:54. I walk the ramp, turn onto the playform and see the train departing. Oh well I say, as I glance up at the indicator board. 7:52 is says. Hold on!!!! 7:52!!!! Fcuk that ... the bleedin train has left early. Typical that ... bleedin typical.

I happen to watch Question Time last night. One of the panelists was Stephen Green from Christian Voice. Now, I am not very religious, but can understand peoples wants and needs to worship. But the performance from Mr Green was a complete eyeopener to me. He began each answer with a quote from "The Sciptures" and bawbled on about Christian Values ad nausium. Christian Values yeah right. I've had a quick look on the Question Time web page to see some of the posters views on Mr Green. They are split ... from coments such as,

I thought the treatment of Stephen Green was a complete disgrace. Janet Street-Porter was particularly irritating. I switched off. To see a Christian figure ridiculed in such a manner made my blood boil. Jon, Bristol and

Stephen Green's performance this evening only serves to demonstrate how some factions of Christian leadership are so disconnected from society, and perhaps the gospel message, they are not able to reach out to those in need. The message is LOVE.Ash Rust, Bristol.

Well there you go, I don't get it myself .... but praise be.

Well we have the Spudz tomorrow and it's going to be one of them matches. I've got that feeling in my water.

My tune of the day: Two Sides to Every Story - Loleatta Holloway

Wild and wacky

Not me today. I have a stinking cold. Sniffling, coughing, spluttering it's not good. Thinking back I haven't had a cold for over two years. I'm not sure what has changed this year? I may have to spend this weekend with some Cold n'flu and a nightnurse. My PJ's came out last night.

There was a security alert at Canon Street tube this morning and you could see the panic in peoples eye. As the Station guy shouted for everyone to evacuate, there was that split second of blind panic, women and children first my a$$. I hoopped onto a Circle Line train ad got out of dodge.

Old Kerry spotted a big fat woman this morning with her staff pass on, a massive ruck sack and she was walking along reading and she thought of me! It's nice to know I create an impression. I bet the book was Harry Potter!!!!

I watched a Def Jam comedy DVD last night and would say I was disappointed.If anyone has seen the The Original Kings of Comedy then you would realise how good this could or maybe should have been. But it wasn't. It even had Dolomite - Rudy Ray Moore doing the same old routine at the end. Oh well, I'll have enough laughs on Saturday when the Charlton play the Spudz.

I was going to do some housework this weekend ... don't make me laugh.

My tune of the day: Can you see where I'm coming from - Instant Funk

Fish and Chips

So we were held up at London Bridge for one hour twenty minutes last night. Someone had thrown themselves under a train at New Cross. I had got on at Charing Cross and it was meant to sail through LB. But we stopped and they opened the doors. You then had everyone try and get on before asking where the train was going. I ended up whistling and singing songs.

There were two people reading books and walking along this morning. Both over London Bridge, and given the fact that it was quite chocker it amazes me. I was tempted to tie my shoe laces.

I have the start of a cold. I have been sniffling for a few hours now. I should go get some Vitamin C. Oh, I had Sugar Puffs for my breakfast.

By the time I got home last night, I couldn't be bothered to cook, so ended up with Fish n'chips. I always end up with a dry piece of fish and cold chips. Mushy Peas rock.

I also ended up watching a DVD of Cedric the Entertainer. Now I would have to say his stand up routine is good.

There seems to be a plethora of Charlton blogs starting up. Oh Andy Hunt over in Belize even has one, and it's deffo worth a read. It's also all gone tits up for Charlton sponsors Allsports. They owe the club loads and have been called a Chav Shopping Chain in the Sun. That's like Genghis Khan calling Hitler a trouble maker. I say get rid of them now, get a new sponsor, put them on the front of the shirt and sell the new one at a discounted rate ... say twenty squids. Job done.

My tune of the day: Purple Rain - Prince

Brighter days ...

So the trains were packed and people wouldn't move down. They just stand there as though I a daze. I'm ok jack, move down you must be 'avin a bubble.

Why is it that only fat middle aged women smoke. Have you noticed as soon as you get in to Cannon Street they all light up. Then they waft them about.

I was listening to an old skool mix this morning. Julia Roberts "Caught in the middle" and stuff. I was feelin' all my 27 years.

So over a third of women have been sexually assaulted after being drunk!!!! Hmmm ... KEV?????

My tune of the day: Tears - Nu Colours

Wemberlee ...

It's a place in North London and they call it wemberlee!!!

We sang the other night when the Monkey Hangers were in town. Yep this will be our year ... until we got drawn away to Chelsea in the next round. Move on ...

So a Dandy Murphy double gave us another 3 points on Saturday. I watched Men watching football and was happy when we went two goals ahead. I was flicking between footie and Queer eye for the straight guy, and got a bit jumpy when the West Brom pulled a goal back, but hey let them eat cake. We are now happy in second with the Spudz up next week, it's all very strange I tell thee.

I had another lazy day yesterday. After getting in at 6am I slept til about noon. Then found myself on the sofa eating hula hoops and cheesy wotsits. I ended up watching Extreme Makeover, which wouldn't have been too bad if I hadn't just started eating a creme brulee. It's a strange old show because how some of these people let them get themselves into this state to start with is well, beyond me.

Oh and Welling are through to the next round of the FA Cup.

I watched some of the MOBO'S on friday night and would say that on TV it came across as a good hour show. But if you read the press it was shambolic, no food or free drink ... hmmm, no real stars, just the same old tired people. Well Victoria Newton of the Sun what do you know. Disastrous for what reason? Do you actually know who Luther Vandross was, and the reason behind the tribute? If you think that Kiss FM (How crap are they by the way) will come up with a great alternative you are quite delusional. David Beckham is up as a nominee in the Male Style category. Oh right, so he doesn't have a stylist or gets given all his clothes for free. He is to style what Kev is to humility.

My tune of the day: Creepin - Luther Vandross

Faith, hope and char-ideee

Well there goes another week. It's the end of summer, the nights are drawing in ... and everyone has got the hump. Ho hum I hear you sigh. I'll have to have some wine at lunchtime.

I think I need to have a complete tidyup in the flat. Yes, I say that once a month and never get round to it. But I need a kick up the backside to do it. Just get 100 black bin bags and crack on. It's a plan, but the chances of me doing it are .... well slim to none. I'll most ptobably end up lying on the sofa watching Be Cool and Cedric the Entertainer. I know how to move it.

There were a plethora of big bags on the train this morning. It must be a weekend thing. The paranoia over bags has definately been forgotten, another ho hum there.

I had a night out last night. Over in Shoreditch with the boys. I haven't seen G,Rod, Glen, Leo and H for a few months. Time does fly. But we hooked up and painted the town some shade of red last night. But we knew it was time to leave when in Herbal they played Under Mi Sleng Teng. Now I like a tune, but per-lease.

My tune of the day: Fantasy - Ten City

Banter

Oh and the girlie emails continue.

They have now got the 'ump with me as I got an email containing this ...

"I am shocked and appaulled, how rude, I mean this is the man who is harping on about it being the last day of 2005 he can wear flip flops and how his stupid alarm woke him up at 5.10 this morning (so there is a god) and he's putting us down for aving a chat - Well, what I say is CHEER UP YOU MISERABLE OLD SOD!!!! I hope that your train is delayed on the way home, that everyone is wearing their staff passes and that you get stuck next to someone who stinks and is fat and carrying a big bag! Oh and by the way the East London lot includes me and Nat and we are South London birds- GET IT RIGHT!

X"

Notice the kiss at the end ... that makes it A OK then ...

WOMEN ....

One of them days ...

You knew it was going to be when the alarm went off at ten past five. What's that all about? I set it for six thirty!!!!! I was sat down drinking tea before I realised.

At least the suns shinning, the sky is blue. I've been blaring out some new tunes this morning to try and cheer myself up, but as yet no luck.

The East London lot are bickering amongst themselves over email. I have been included on the email to list but I can't even be bothered to get into it with them. They are talking, as only girls can .... a load of old baloney.

I had an enjpyable evening over at Neil and Ellies. I saw their new daughter Naiomi for the first time. I have to admit I don't understand all this baby stuff. But hey ...!!!!

Luckily I didnt sit through the Man City and Donnie game. Apart from 5 minutes it looked pants. But then again that could have been Charlton, quite easily. We're in the hat so we'll just have to take what's given.

I'm led to believe that the nights are now longer than the days. That's all well and good, but doesn't allow me to wear flip flops without catching my death of cold. Today may be the last flip flop day this year. Sad times.

It's just dawnmed on me that I won't be at footie this weekend. I may just try and look round for a game to catch. Cray Wanderers or Bromley ... surely it can't be that bad!!!

My tune of the day: Foxy Brown - Willie Hutch

Hanging Monkeys for fun ....

Yep, those pesky kids were sent packing, their ball burst and their backsides well and truly spanked. Yea, we all knew it was going to happen. When Charlton were drawn out of the hat against Huddersfield, no, no .. er, er erm I mean Hartlepool it was a game we couldn't or wouldn't want to miss. Our first competitive outing against the boys from the NE, but another chance to get on the road to Wembley. We would turn up, spank them 3/4 nil and move on. No I didn,'t think so either. We went one nil down, phaffed around a bit but eventually with the exuberance of youth saw them off. All this for a tenner, and Grimsby beat the Spudz. Oh happy days.

I finally got the Sony Ericsson file manager thingy to work yesterday, so I could download some pics from my hols. It only took 2 weeks for me to figure out that the software was corrupt and that I should reload it. Cutting edge and all that.

I finally got a text off of Leafy Leigh telling me of the arrival of her baby girl. There was me waiting to find out, but not hearing anything. I didn't want to go charging in there size 9's akimbo, just incase. Then she says that she was sure that she had told me she had had a daughter ... called India. Well, I said I'm sure you hadn't. Women!!!!

The Office move is over and after doing it single handed, I was treated to a slap up at Lahore Kebab House. The lamb chops are to die for, and as for the Sag Gosht, well. Luckily I didn't over do it ... and if you believe that.

Also before I forget, I was saddened to hear of the death of Willie Hutch over the last few days. RIP Soul Brother.

My tune of the day: That's What Love Does - Vincent Montana Jr

Some holiday snaps

It's a flip-flop world ...

Yep I was there as the might of the Russian Army overran one of the smaller non confrontational independent states. They had more guns, bigger tanks, and it appeared that our smaller band of soldiers all had trench foot!!!!

As the second goal hit the back of the net, both myself and Danny Murphy shrugged our shoulders and knew that that was it. The future had been Orange, but now it was truely blue and gold!!!!!! They had killed the beautiful game. Pele would be turning in his grave if he was in one. The King is dead, long live the king.

Yes I know, a load of old bullshite really, but the moment Robben collapsed on the floor, grabbing the ball only for the imbecile in charge to wave play on you knew that that was it. What an excellent player that Robben is. He is quick, flight of feet but somewhere down the line that wasn't enough. He has been coached to fall on the floor at every opportunity. He fell in the box looking for a penalty, fell in the middlke of the park looking for a free kick in fact at every opportunity he fell over. Go on Robben you carry on.

But the one that got me ... the incident when Makelele deliberately impedede Romm as he was away.

Chgelsea you can kiss my ass ...

My tune of the day: Amazing Love - Anane

Powerade ...

I post something I think is topical, and no one bleedin' comments. Typical. I should have continued lamenting about cr-i-ckit.

I'm currently undertaking an office move on my own. Everyone lese has the day off, or is "working from home". I can smell a rat here. I've moved about 6 big filing cabinets, 4 printers, 4 PC's, 2 servers ... and there's still shed loads to do. I need a refreshing drink and a good lunch. I haven't even had time to read the paper. What's the price of petrol me asks?

I'm quite looking forward to the match tomorrow. But not that much.

My tune of the day: Buttercup - Carl Anderson

Death of the Metrosexual male ...

Righto, it seems death of the metrosexual male has been greatly exaggerated. Now supposedly we have the ubersexual. Yep, add doing housework and demanding in bed to the mix. It can't be true surely, we still have a way to go to educated the masses. If you have a gym membership, subscribe to a glossy male magazine, like to wear stylish (sometimes loud clothes), use a lot of "products", have a facial (still the best bit of pampering in my book), wear pink, you could be classed as a metrosexual male. If not then you most probably wear Northface, Stone Island, chunky jewelry and or a flat cap. No, that's not a Northern jib, because as Wendal says, even Northerners have the Internet, MTV and style mags. That's better than the Industrial Revolution.

Word on the street is that the Global Economy depends, no demands that men shop as much as women. That men buy these "products", that they like the lesser sex become subservient to advertising.

Just look at Kev, wearing stripy jumpers and drinking rose wine. Who would have thought in a few years back. How the mighty have fallen.

Somewhere out there, there is still the feeling that doing these things is girly. Say Seven, Eight years ago living your life like this would be unimaginable. Just look how Vince now highlights his hear, wears pink, moisturises. But then drinks horrible lager by the bucket load and wouldn't be seen dead near a gym. Sometimes you have to do it, or just leave it.

Talking about doing it or leaving it, I saw something last night that did make me chuckle. I went out for a bit of dinner with the lovely Natasha (she paid ;) and was stood at the bar. Some bloke saunters up and asks for two glasses of champagne. The barman looks at him and says ... "We don't sell champagne by the glass sir, only by the bottle". The bloke takes a step back. He looks worried. He stops, thinks ... "Hmmm he says, give me a second I'll just go and ask". The bloke then trots over to a nearby table and begins to talk to this girl sitting there.Now come on. Per-lease. If you're going to come out with your bo, and do the champagne thing ... either do it or just leave it.

My tune of the day: Saturdays - Alexander Hope

Chicken Legs ...

Some people are getting a tad annoyed that their new love for cricket is being questioned. The same people who have slagged it off now "love" it, as if. I bet they never had subbuteo cricket, or test match as a child ... or spent half of the 6 weeks school holiday trying to get your ball back from next door. That's why some people get pissed off. Because of all these jonny come latelies, if that's the way to spell it.

It appears that the Chelsea charged 48 squids for their match against Anderlecht last night. Yep, it's champions league, but per-lease. For that sort of money I'd have wanted Jose to come round my gaff and give me the tickets personally. But then again that's just me.

I'm just reading a quote regarding the spat that Rooney and Beckham had last week. Rooney called Becks a flash b*stard!!!!! Righto.

The trains where fcuked last night. There was a fatality on the 5:54 train to Sidcup. Yep I complain about the journeys, the trains the people, but they are never that bad.

I'm thinking of going organic ...

My tune of the day: Sadie (she smokes) - Joe Bataan feat. Jocelyn Brown

They're coming home ...

Well come on ... they never even leave these shores. I'm here giggling at all the fever surrounding NuCricket as I watch a bus ride through Central London. I even laughed at Richard Littlejohn this morning with his quote "You can always tell the game's up when dopey birds in replica shirts start latching on to sport, despite not having the faintest idea what's going on ..."

Come on. England won the Ashes. It's great for England, for cricket but I don't get what it's all about. They don't play cricket in schools, more people than not have told me it's a crap game, not interested, blah, blah. It's a great game. I saw Viv hit 200 in a day, Viv also steer the West Indies home against the Aussies at Lords in 83, Faoud Bacchus run out Geoff Miller from the boundary in 90 something. I even went down to Taunton with Big D and Don a few years ago to see Kent in the C&G. Given that Middlesex are my team, it was a great day out. Cricket is a great game, a great day or 5 days out if you please. Even KEV has got carried away. Now Kev is encased in Stockholm telling us how great Sweden is for Sport, life and luxury. But he becomes a true English gent when it suits him. Even up to the point of sending me a text last night at 11:30 saying, and I quote ...

" Viv Richards, Joel Garner, Andy Roberts, Malcolm Marshall, you took a hell of a beating"

Well I think England may just beat this team above. Given that Malcolm is no longer with us and Joel may have put on a bit of weight. But Kev, the West Indies have never played for the Ashes ... not even Ramadine and Valentine (Do you know who they are?)

It's just dawned on me that we are playing the Chels on Saturday. Don't you just hate the way they have bought the title. It's all a laugh though ain't it.

Life was a bit better on the trains today. Although some woman was stood in the aisle filling her nails. She was proper going for it. What's that all about?

My tune of the day: Give It Up - Eminence Feat. Kathy Brown

Chocolate Covered strawberries ....

Well that was the plan, but typically I got waylayed !!!!!!

I'm sitting here watching the cricket, and it appears it's going to be a very strained day. Warne just turned the ball 2.5 feet. That's a hell of a long way. But if England are going to win it they will have to do it on the pitch, the hard way. As it should be.

It's a funny old game this cricket. It's a great game, and I can sit there and watch 5 days of a test with no problem. Generally concensus is that Cricket is crap, it takes too long to play and is for old men. Now, we have it on the back pages and front pages. Freddie Flintoff is the new Jonny Wilkinson, and it's gone all trendy. Oh well, it's swings and roundabouts because England will be crap again in a few years and no one will be interested.

Did I tell you about my Chocolate covered strawberries? No!!!! Oh well. I went to Borough Market on Saturday. The intention was to get some nice food, have a little drink and check on WAP how Charlton were getting on.

(Warnes just got another wicket ...!!!!!)

Well, it started raining, Charlton went 1-0 up and I couldn't find chocolate for toffee. I got some strawerries, some blackberries, some figs but no Chocolate. There goes the best plans.

I had one of them trips to work today. It was overcast, it was a bit cold, the trains were packed and there were people kicking up a stink. One bloke got on at Lewisham and smelt of shite. I kid you not. I had to keep my mouth shut, and breath slowly through my nose. But bleedin' hell, some people should sort themselves out. There was also a bloke at London Bridge who was trying to get the biggest two bags onto a packed train. It just makes me laugh that he thought he could get in, plus his two bags onto a train with no room in it. There was another train along in a few minutes.

You can definately tell that Autumn is here. There's a chill in the air. It's not good, but the nights will be drawing in soon enough.

(Whooops Freddies just out ....)

I've decided I'm going to have to throw some of my clothes out. I've got too many. It'll hurt, but hey.

You wouldn't want to be Michael Vaughan at this moment ...

My tune of the day: Big Picture - Izzi Dunn

Hats off

I would have to say, it was a supurb performance from England in the firld today. Freddie and Hoggy were supurb.

Also Charlton won at Birmingham, and sit second in the table. You wouldn't believe it from any of the press coverage but sod em.

My tune of the day: A House is not a home - Luther Vandross

185 - 1

So Harmison has just got the first wicket. The Ashes are now dependent on the rain ... it's only cricket.

I'm a tad bored, but not as bored as some people ...

My tune of the day: Superficial People - Ten City

Carnival Pictures ...

Laughing in the face of adversity ...

I watched a bit of the news on the Katrina disaster last night. It was the first time I'd seen any of the news from a British point of view. It was quite an eyeopener and actually puts news reporting in context. I compare this to the 24/7 coverage on CNN. The news in the US can be quite critical and they do try and question what is actually going on. There was an interesting take on the Kanye West outburst where in the US they actually agreed with what he said. If they ever mentioned in over here it would be seen as pandering to this so called PC brigade. PC my ass.

An interesting day at the Oval yesterday. It has been amusing seeing the increase in Cricket in the media. It happened with Rugger now with the gentlemans game. So it's alright to sing Jerusalem, but not bang tin cans ... hypocrits.

So Curb It thinks I should get the train to Brum. I was thinking of wandering off to Borough Market instead to treat myself ... you decide.

My tune of the day: Runnin - Jon Cutler feat. Pete Simpson

Reality Check...

Yep, back at work and it's as though my holiday never happened. I've been trying to download some of the pics I took, but typically they are not loading up. I'll put them up when I can get the damn thing to work.

I stayed up and watched the England match last night. It surprises me that they get so much critisism!!!! Why? Because they aren't much cop are they? As a team they are, what you may call shite. Individually they have some quality. But please, all the hystrionics ... you'll be saying we'll (notice that Kev) win the Ashes next!!!!

I bought quite a lot of stuff on my hols. Tees, trainers, some jeans. The bag was creaking as I came home. I did get a fantastic Lionel Ritchie Fan Club teeshirt. I'll put a pic of that up soon too.

Thinking back it's been quite a hectic couple of weeks. I had the Metro City Weekender thingy with free drink on the bank holiday Saturday. Then there was the Carnival on the Sunday and the Monday. That was funny. I do actually need a weekend of relaxation. Lie back and watch men watching football tell me how our lot are getting on up in Brum. That should be interesting.

It's funny not having read the papers for over a week, or bothering to check on line. You realise how you don't need to read the Sun for a daily laugh. A reality check indeed.

My tune of the day: Wake up everybody - Teddy Pendergrass

Back in blighty ...

Well how knackered am I? But I've got to watch the England/ Ireland of the North match tonight. I'll be back on tomorrow, with some thoughts on Philly and NYC ...

Greetings from Philly

As I sit in the ING Internet Cafe having just diggested the biggest Tuna Melt the world has seen, my thoughts turn to nothing more important as what pair of trainers to buy next. Shopping in Philly is ... as they say awesome, and NY City is to come.

Anyway good luck to Franny Freshners up in Scoootland, and welcome the Booth-man.

My tune of the day: Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John (Get in there Glen ....)

Oran Juice Jones

Well they only finally went and done it. Yep, they delivered my Sofa. Only 6 months 2 weeks and three days. But hey if I wanted an easy life I'd support Chelsea and go to DFS.

It turned up as you would expect in the back of a big van. I also got a big black spider and two of the cushions soaked in water. That's fair though, because at least I've got the damn thing. I can now have a nice sit down or maybe even a lie down. The choice is mine.

It's been a bit hectic lately. Working like a worky thing given that I am the only one in the office. Fitting in a hair cut before I depart for my hollybobs, and generally going out having a great time. I had a drunken night in Canary Wharf yesterday. It was all due to the sambuccas. It even made me get some chicken and chips on the way home. Not good. The night before I had a great night at Cafe Kick over in Shoreditch. An hour of bar football, some drinks a nice bit of food ... how else would you like to spend an evening?

It looks like it's going to be a hectic weekend. I've got a free ticket for the Metro SW4 DOO tomorrow. It could be free booze. We then have two days of the Notting Hill Carnival. Over Kensal Green sides, we have Good Times and Norman Jay playing the party tunes. A bottle of rum and some dancing shoes and I'll be well away. Then Tuesday it's off for a well earned break. I'll be doing my best Rocky impression running up the stairs. I'll get some pics for you.

My tune of the day: - That's What Love Does (Louis Benedetti Mix) - William 'Smoke' Howard

Day at the races ...

Had one of them days yesterday, so will be back to post more in a bit ....

Current Nearest Observations: heavy rain 15°CS (19 mph)
Relative Humidity (%): 90
Pressure (mB): 1007, Falling
Visibility: Moderate

From the BBC weather page. Jesus, it's been raining non stop all day, it's summer. We have a bank holiday weekend coming up, WTF. There is definately something wrong ... oh and don't wear flip-flops if you can't carry them off ...

I found some old maths coursework ... 

Bish, bosh ... bash

Some thinks are quite annoying. I was reading about "Lotto Lout" Michael Carroll this morning and his ex-bird said, to quote ... "He loved to pelt traffic wardens with Big Macs ... there was ketchup everywhere." Well hello, there is no ketchup in Big Macs, everybody knows it's special sauce. Jesus. At least get your facts right.

It's also quite funny ready footballers recall certain games and incidents in matches. I was reading a Scott Parker interview on the way to Sunderland a week or so ago. He was bleating about this and that, but said one of his best matches was the boxing day victory over Chelsea. He said we were up against it and went one nil down early doors, before equalising then hanging on for dear life. Hang on a minute. Was this the Boxing Day match in 2003, when we beat the Chels 4-2. The one where HH scored in the first stroke second minute. The one where Chelse equalised with their first attack, then sat back as Charlton ran riot. Where Paulo made John Terry look stupid, and Matty Holland scored a cracking header, Euelly that incredible half volley and with twenty minutes left we were 4-1 up. Yes, Scott, it's the same match you were playing in the damn thing ... so at least get your facts right.

I've just noticed it's started raining again. Oh there goes the summer. It's oh so depressing. Where's the sun?

My tune of the day: Gypsy Woman - Curtis Mayfield

The King of Flip Flops ...

Well i never knew flip-flops would be so controversial. From Lattimers use of my lime green number to Giles saying the only other flip flop wearer he knows is Gandhi. It's as though I was wearing an indian headdress or a pair of backless chaps. They are flip-flops straight off Ipanema beach, well one pair was from Copacabana, but really. I like flip-flops and I'll wear them ... but not at the Notting Hill Carnival.

It still annoys me when people stand at the ticket barrier and then fumble for their ticket. What's that all about? It annoys me when people sit on the outside seat and put their bag inside. Per-lease. It annoys me when get off at Cannon Street and light up straight away. For heavens sake, give peace a chance.

I've just heard that I may finally be getting my sofa. I've been waiting for 5 months and was finally giving up hope. So I went back to the showroom. It had been turned into a coffee bar. Lucky that eh? So I go in explain the situation to the Eastern European "Beauty" behind the counter. She plays dumb. Don't know him, don't know any sofa shop. But given that the Sofa Shop proprietor was Eastern European and was telling me about his plan for a coffee shop, I let her carry on. I have to say I was getting more and more adjatated, and she then said I couldn't speak to her like that. You have to laugh. I said I should come back with a van and take the sofas in the coffee shop. She said you can't do that. I said watch me.

You know what, I left my number and within 4 minutes I had a call. A bloke, the owner of the Sofa shop. Oh that's a coincidence. He has my sofa on the van. His phone had been stolen, he didn't have my number. Yea right. He can deliver in the next two days. So I've phoned the back-up. Watch this space.

My tune of the day: First Time - Kenny Carvejal ft Carla Pratha

In Thomas we trust ....

So I sit there reveling in the Addicks actually want to attack, and as Thomas flicks the ball back behind his body a shout goes up ...

"Just bleedin clear it ..."

Hang on!!!! Clear it, we are attacking, against Wigan ... and in reality you want him to boot the ball up the pitch. Sometimes you wonder why you bother. Thomas may be, just may be the best ball player I've seen at Charlton, and for him to "boot da ball" is sacriledge. I want to see him beat a man, then go back and beat him again. Take the piss. Do those step overs, wiggle his leg, shake his head, his foot, his ass whatever he has to. I have had years of watching Brendan O'Connell plough the furrow, now I want to be entertained. You can't tell me that Paul Mortimer taking the Michael i the snow at the New London Stadium wasn't one of your alltime favourite Charlton moments? Or the Killer overhead kick against Hull City which on the Big Match goal of the season. It's all about entertainment .. that's what I want.

I'd just like to put in print how good Alexi Smertin and Dandy Murphy were on Saturday. Now these two compliment each other, and long may it continue.

The X-Factor!!! Wha'ts that all about? We've had that, surely, they can't keep flogging a dead horse?

It's August, and it's been raining all day ... it must be close to the bank holiday? All down hill to Christmas then. I'll have to start getting my Chrimbo list together. Luckily I didn't hang my washing out on the line this morning. Decisions, decisions ...

I can't wait for a paperless office ...

My tune of the day: Gloria's Muse - Blaze

The rain in spain ...

As the black clouds crossed the sky yesterday afternoon, they mirrored the look on my face. The sun had shone for 3 days, in fact yesterday lunch time as I ate some sushi in Borough Market the temperature was touching 100 degrees. Yes, I know I am prone to exageration but hey, as Bern would say it's my blog. Anyway ... you may wonder why I was that bothered about the weather? Generally, as nice as it is when the sun shines, I have a lot of other things to moan about before the weather. But last night I had booked to go Somerset House to sit in the 18th century courtyard and combibe an urban picnic, there woprds not mine, with live DJing and a film ... in this case Spirited Away. Well anyway, the clouds did hold off ... brussels pate and blue cheese was consumed as well as lashing and lashings of ginger beer. All in all a quality night, quality company ... even if I do say so myself.

Today however the rain is falling. It's like we haven't had rain for months, then all of a sudden it all wants to fall at once. Just in time for the weekend. The weekend before the Bank Holiday weekend, and the Notting Hill Carnival.

Before we get to next weekend we've got to get through this one, and our first ever fixture against Wigan Athletic. It should actually be interesting given the fact that we have a sort of match against them on Saturday morning. Yep CIAFC are back and have their first game of the season. I'm down to play in goal, but we will wait and see.

After last weeks victory at Sunderland I'm actually quite looking forward to the game tomorrow. Famous last words eh!!!!!

My tune of the day: Brand New Dance - BeBe Winans

Sea lions and bleedin Coco the Clown ...

Indeed. It appeared that aliens came down to earth kidnapped the England Football Squad and replaced them with a set of Clowns in an experiment that would test the patience of the best of us. We had a line up including Rio, Becks, Rooneeeeee, Joseph Cole. Now tell me, what's the average weekly wage here. Shed loads, yes, no? But last night it appeared that what we had was a set of players that couldn't be bothered, couldn't motivate themselves, couldn't kick it, (yes they can) ... or even act like they cared. Gerrard was a pale imitation of the Liverpool player, Lumpard was overweight, and outfought by Tommy Gravesen, Cole of the J variety kept cutting back onto his right foot ... and Becks was concentrating on his hair more than his flare. The funniest moment though was at the end of the game. When being interviewed David James said that he wasn't mentally prepared for the game. Well I had to have a little sit down then. He's a footballer, that's what he does. So when would be be prepared? Have I missed something here? Thank the lord that Darren didn't have to get off the bench for this one. His time will come.

Right, after that shambles I turned over and watched the Channel 4 blockbuster !!!! LOST.

I'm not sure what it's all about, but what I did learn is that the Americans can still make shmultsey, cringeworthy TV. The end bit when Walt finds his dog, to a soft rock accompaniment is ... well you get me. Yes, I'll be watching, but it is surprising that the BBC can't make such stirling TV. Extras my ass.

It just dawned on me that I've never seen Wigan play football. That'll be a new team. It must be my first new team since er, Yeovil last year. But they do have Jason Roberts up front. I wonder what sort of game the centre halves will be expecting?

Oh back to England. How does Glen Johnson get a game? He doesn't even play for Chelskov. It makes a mockery of actually picking players that can do a job. Jeez, just let me get over it. Anyway at least Romm scored.

Guess what? I'm really happy with the Sony Ericsson K750i. The camera is good and it actual does what it says on the tin. Whoooosh.

My tune of the day: New York House - Marlon D

My attire ... and nobody says a word 

Sea lions on me shirt ...

Blimey, the Ashes euphoria has been taken up by Becks and Co, and En-ger-land are going to win the World Cup next year. I for one would love this to happen, but per-lease. Aren't we all realists? When we get down to it, in either the quarters or Semis we'll all be let down ... again.

So what's the chances of Darren playing for the Seniors tonight? Even a half hour run out. I for one hope that he enjoys his experience and maybe doesn't get thrown to the lions. Remember what happened to Ricketts, to Jeffers and Konchesky!!! His time will come, but I just want him fit and happy for Saturday.

I've just been reading the Metro about Online dating. Now I don't want to be a killjoy of anything but frankly I find this all very strange. Does anyone know an Online date fiend? Who isn't a Creepy Older Man!!!!! No thought not. However the page in the Metro does give a few tips. Like be specifiv, don't say "I'm outdoorsy", say "this is my favourite mountain to climb in the Lake District" or in fact say why you don't really like Leeds Castle. Avoid a list of adjectives, be positive, don't have unrealistic expectations .. ha ... avoid cliches!!!!! They're having a laugh!!!! Aren't they? How am I meant to explain my love of long walks on the beach, candlelit dinners and Sunday in bed with the papers. Oh well, Online dating ... not for me.

Do you realise they are still two more tests to play. We've got to endure this Nu-Cricket even more. Brian Johnson will be turning in his grave.

I've just popped outside for a coffee. Talk about "Phew what a scorcher ..."

My tune of the day: I might do something wrong - Tortured Soul

It was a great morning until I walked into the Office door ....

Right then. After my headbanging session I can actually now concentrate on what I am doing. The cricket ...!!!! The Sun says "Vaughan's hero's robbed by ONE wicket". Call me old fashioned but robbed??? That's the whole point of the game, to bowl your opposition out twice. That's two lots of ten wickets. Not nine but ten. So England are robbed!!!! By whom? It was a great game, yes ... but don't treat us like idiots.

I had a washing and ironing frenzy last night. A weeks worth of ironing as well as three loads of washing, meant the flat was like a Chinese laundry. I also watched Old Boy an interesting Korean film, but did miss some bits due to ironing instead of watching the subtitles.

Well last night was the first BB-less night for 3 months. How did we all cope? Yeah, thought as much.

No news on the Charlton transfer targets. There's a lot of hypothetical drivel about Bowyer and Marcus Bent, but I'll wait for Curbs to sort it out.

My tune of the day: My baby knows (I like it) The New Yorkers

The answer to our question

On leaving the Stadium of Light on Saturday, the question was when was the last time we won the first match of a season away from home?

The answer just in ... 21 years ago but against whom I haven't the foggiest.

We are top of the league ...

Well it's not for me to gloat, or to even get too carried away. But after getting stuffed at Bolton this time last season this result definitely made the relatively easy journey up North all the more worthwhile. I'll also like to say "Unlucky" to all the overweight, sunbed loving Makem Muppets who tried to give it at the Stadium of Light on Saturday. Evidently as Jordan says what goes around comes around.

It was in effect a long old day. Up at 6:30, shower and shave then onto London Bridge. I met Rod on his way to work, then after meeting James a short hop to Kings Cross. The 8:30 was on time and a table was commandeered for the journey. We left Doncaster in our wake and arrived at Newcastle at 11:34. Now what is funny is that for weeks people have been moaning about the trains being up the swanny, that it was too expensive, that flying was the only way ... yadda yadda. Well we had no hastle, and even had a few beers on the way.

After booking into our hotel ... the Caledonian we went into town to crack on. A few G&T's, some of Mrs Vinces chips and we were on the Metro going to the Stadium of Light. Now generally the Makems are non plussed about Charlton fans. We both went through that Play Off final so we all know what's what. But you still get a few herberts, it's a shame really ... but that's the life of a football fan. It could be worst though. I watched some of the Wigan v Chels game yesterday. Now I am no Chels fan but I found it funny that they scored in the 93rd minute and even funnier that Jose had to console Paul Jewel. But when Sky interviewed some "Wigan fans" after the game one bloke in his new shiny home kit said, this is my first ever game and although a little disappointed we did ok. Another said "Hey oop, we'll be alriteeee, we'll be looking to finish 5th or 6th." Fwuk me ... football fans!!!! Quite remarkable really ... but I'm sure he'll enjoy his trip to the Valley next week? No !!!!

Has anyone noticed how although Our Anthony won BB, the papers both yesterday and today are full of Makosi!!! Exclusive interviews, following the dream love ... you go for it. After watching her interview with Davina I did wonder why the best alround housemate ever had to go through this, when the likes of Maxwell and Craig were seen as cheeky harmless chappies.

On a football note it was good to see Welling Utd get off to a great start on Saturday. I have to say I always look out for their results. Sad, yes I know.

I've just been looking up the weather forcast for London this week. Can you really trust these people? It's going to be sunny all week, or so they say. What if I wanted to have an evening outdoors and it rains? Who do I sue?

My tune of the day: You got me hung up - King Tutt

Ramadine and Valentine ...

Come on then all you nu-age cricket lovers who sang that calypso with the line ...

"With them two pal of mine, Ramadine and Valentine"

You don't know? Well why not ask Kevin Everett or Bonnie Razzil as they seem to be liking the sound of leather on willow.

It seems that the Aussies are creeping back into the match. Whatever Mr Cooksley thinks, 359 - 6 isn't a great score on this pitch.

It's the start of the Premier League tomorrow. A trip up to Sunderland sees us far away from home on this first Saturday. At least it's a night out on the raz. Drowning ones sorrows after watching our 4-5-1 huff and puff and failing to blow the house down. If you want an indepth rundown on the first match go read the Official Site, or All Quiet, or Frankie or Valley James. I can't really be bothered to talk about whether Bent will struggle as a lone gunman, whether we should put Dennis upfront to complement Bent, whether we need a new centre half, why we are wearing white ... or whether the best form of transport is plane, train or automobile.

And as for Fantasy Football ... you are definitely taking the piss.

It all ends tonight. Yep Big Brother crawls over the finishing line, like the proverbial damp squib. Eugene took the money, like anybody would have said NO ... get over yourself, Makosi is an actress, bothered, wateva, loser, wannabe, Craig is still biatching for England ... did you see his mother blame editing for his portrayal as an idjut? And Kinga in that cheerleaders outfit ... whooosh, it's the hottest day of the year.

Oh, I'm still having problems getting my sofa. I'll be writting about this next week ... it should give some of you a laugh.

My tune of the day: Luv 4 2 - Michael Watford

Phones and tings ...

Somewhere down the line I have got it into my head that I need to upgrade and get a new phone. I don't really, the Nokia I am using is good, easy, and does what it says on the tin. But I've had it for a year so it's that time. Well here's where the problems start!!! I've already had two new models and sent them straight back. A nokia without a keypad and a motorola that I couldn't get my head round. I do put myself in these positions. Even Orange who I have been with for the last year have started to pish me off. Charged me an upgrade fee when I shouldn't have been, and then have just informed me that to deliver a new phone would take 3-4 working days!!!! Hello ... what's wrong with Special Delivery?

Oh sod it ... I'm going for the Sony Ericsson K750i on Vodafone. It's easier to change provider as they throw free minutes and reduced line rental at you. Oh hang on ... they are saying the PAC code isn't live any more!!! I'll have to phone Orange again and hang on the line for 15 minutes. Time hanging on the phone, it's great ... allows one to think.

Oh bolloxs do I need a new phone?

So England won the toss and decided to bat. A lovely day, in the sun watching McGrath and Lee toil. If you believe that ... You're Cooksley in disguise.

I'm on the phone to Orange. Why am I leaving? Idiot. He says it will cost me in the long term. Are they going to send the boys round, Oh hold the horses. They are offering me £95 loyalty bonus!!!! £95 to stay with Orange. Should I stay or should I go. Sod it ... I'm like Eugene I'll take the money and run. Easily pleased me.

My tune of the day: For the love of money - The O'Jays

Blimey, I've only gone and sorted the header out ... I am webmaster ...

Fuzzy ...

Back from a spin class. The Wednesday one is always a bit boring, as it's all about seated hill climbs. Not really my bag.

I had a little bit of a play with blogger this morning ... but I'm still not sure some of the graphics I want to upload will work.

Can anyone tell me why in the midst of a lovely sunny week, there are still blokes walking around with rain coats and golfing umbrellas? What is that all about. The same blokes wear their staff passes round their neck. Maybe I'm missing something?

My tune of the day: Punch Up - Laid

The boy Bowman ... Blackpools finest?

It's actually quite laughable the things that happen back at young Claires house!!! At what point did the boy Bowman get caught up in this garb? That must have been when I was outside watching the drug bust, or down the chicken shop. Or maybe it was when I was outside marrying Poppy and Trevor ... answers on a postcard.

I'm actually tingling at the moment with the thought of the Footie season upon us. A trip to Sunderland is winnable, but this is Charlton ... and if you remember when we actually went up first time, the Saints of Southampton came calling thinking the same, and were sent hone on the wrong end of a 5-0 scoreline. It's a long way to Sunderland for a crap performance. It's a long way to watch us huff and puff in a 4-5-1 formation ... you know that's what will happen. But I'm still a bit tingley.

I sat down to watch BB last night, and think the show has gone on a couple of weeks too long. It's not even interesting viewing. Watching Makosi, Eugene, and Craig take it in turns to ball. All we want is someone with some balls to stand up.

supposedly this Friday is going to be a scorcher ... so it will be flip-flop day around South London.

My tune of the day: Testify - Romanthony

It's an afternoon/ evening out in East London. Styling and profiling ... you can have some fun Hackney way.

It was an interesting weekend. Lashings of red wine, England nearly throwing away the Ashes series, Charlton crashing to their first defeat in a pre-season friendly ... and a KFC for Sunday lunch.

I won't even entertain the Simon Jordan debate. I know what sort of bloke he is, you know what sort of bloke he is ... but still there are some sympathisers. One email from the PO list states

"Jordan's very long on his own rhetoric as he showed in his article in the Observer yesterday, but the article in terms of its readability and its contents was far more lively and far more pertinent than the turgid blandness of Curbs columns last season."

Yes, I believe so. But what do we want from our manager, our chairman, our club? Cutting edge, er .. edgyness? Curbs telling a warts and all account of his day to day tet a tets with Euelly, Fanny and Merv. Telling us what he really thinks of Arse, and Jose. No, we don't. Well I don't. I want a bit of respect, respect for us as customers ... it's football, not World War 3 ... but tell that to Jordan.

I hope you all watched the final half hour of the Second test yesterday. The way England huffed and puffed, eventually grabbing that final wicket. It was finger biting stuff, even Barn would have been proud.

I've just been sent a pic of Timbo last week. I'll have to clear it before I stick it up ... but it made me laugh.

My tune of the day: I wish I didn't miss you - Angie Stone

Or not as the case might be. Typically Bern put a cat amongst the pigeons yesterday, when he said that he only gives his blog address out to selected people. Graham did then wonder what the point was, but poor old Bornie took a bit of a pasting on the Netadicks board about his fences. He even suggested that I had created a false persona to start the muck raking. Like I've got nothing better to do.

So England are back on track in the Ashes series? It's a question not a statement. Because I think they should have been looking to post 500 plus. Not one of their top batsmen got to post a big score. But that's England I suppose. It should be an interesting day.

It seems I got a shout out on the Forever Charlton site yesterday. Although I'm not primarily a Charlton only blog, I do talk about my Charlton experience. But they put me up as riscardo.co.uk and not by the page title The King of Sweden. Not a major concern but just big enough to grate on me.

I can't believe it's the weekend already. After last weeks, two day soiree I may have a quiet one. Saying that, life is but a moment.

I was a bit bored with Big Brother last night. Sitting there watching Craig, bitch and moan, moan and bitch is not good entertainment. He constantly has a go at Eugene then Derek, but in reality he is the one that should be shown the door. I think I've had enough of it .... so I'll be watching Smackdown tonight instead.

My tune of the day: Amazing love - Anane

Reach for the stars ...

It will be interesting viewing when we turn up t the Stadium of Light on 14 August. Another season in the Premier league, expectation levels at a high. What will this year bring? European football ... dear god, relegation!!!! But this is Charlton, so anything can happen. What we will now is that up one end of the Stadium will be sitting the best goalscorer we've had down the Valley since Killer back in the days. Yep, Sir Clive will be using voucher 1 in his Sunderland season ticket book, hoping his boys put one over on us. It's been a few years now since Clive left. We've had Andy Hunt playing up front. The boy Lisbie, Jeffers ... but no one to write home about. That is ... until now.

This is said with some hope, but what we saw last night actually left me with a smile on my face. A striker willing to lead the line. A striker willing to have a shot, to run the channels, to get his head on the end of it. Even a striker that romances Lady Luck. Step forward Darren Bent. Let's hope that I haven't put a mockers on him.

I arrived back home last night just in time to catch the last 15 minutes of BB. I turned on, and watched as Craig and Anthony had another Lovers Holiday. I nearly choked on my super noodles however when Craig piped up ...

"There is a famous saying in history ... fortune favours the bold!!!!"

Blimey, I must have missed that one. It's like watching then chuckle brothers with these two, to you, to me ...

Now, it amused me a day or so ago that Kevin left a comment about this rose wine thingamy. For about 9 months Kev has been banging on about how Rose is the new black, and is very fashionable in Sweden. A bit like crayfish, and meatballs. Kev drinks rose wine whilst wearing a stripy shirt stroke jumper. Fashionable to the uneducated no doubt, but really Kev you are missing out on a lot being in the land of the Volvo. Drinking Rose is not about being fashionable. It's about being cheap. Drink Belvedere Vodka ... or Greygoose. Or a sloeberry gin. Come on Kev kep up.

I received my new Motorola V3 phone. I hated it so I sent it back. Surely there must be a phone out there that I like? Yea, the one I already have !!!!

My tune of the day: Fly Away - Billy Love

So there we have it, no fanfare, no announcement ... just the pics up on the website and info that you can buy them on Saturday. I do like it though. Even though it looks like Liverpools from two years ago!!!! No, I never thought that, but that's what someone said on Netaddicks. I'm sure we wore white/ black back in the 60's and 70's and even the 90's. I like it, and on this page that's all that matters.

Whilst I'm on about Netaddicks, there seems to be a consensus for Bern to bring his picture blog back. Come on Bern ... Just do it.

I hope you were all watching Big Brother last night? Has there ever been such a person after their 15 minutes more than Kinga. Tits oooot, simulated sex with a bottle ... squatting on the dinner table!!!! Poor old Derek and Eugene. Both have had a part to play in this seasons BB but now one is out leaving Kinga in there. She should be booted out. Just for being a wrongun. She's not big (well her tats are) and she's deffo not clever. And it's embarrassing. It really is one of those, need to turn the TV over moments.

I've decided to go to the Valley tonight so I may need to tape tonight's BB. Decisions, decisions ...

My tune of the day: South Bronx - BDP

Superficial people

It seems that everyone has a point to make about ever subject. Whatever the information, people like to spout off. Whether it's about the latest fad for striped shirts and rose wine or the London bombings or even the latest gross murders in London and Liverpool. Someone call the fashion police there's a man outside in socks and sandals. Is that it, is that all she wrote? Wear what you want, but wear it with pride. It's only people who aren't comfortable with themselves that will mock, people who move as a pack, the ones who sy they smoked because off peer pressure. What a load of bunkum!!!

Now I say this because as usual I logged onto Netaddicks this morning. Just to find the latest on Bernies fences really. It's actually a Charlton Athletic message board, so you can learn all the latest bits of gossip, like Andy Johnson at Palarse has signed a new 5 year deal, that Charlton are after Marcus Bent, that some murders and more important than others!!!! What?? Is that right? Nope, not from my angle it's not. But some people do get over excited about "What the papers say." Netaddicks is not your usual message board. Oh no. It's the life and soul for some people. In fact you can learn much more about people you meet on there than people would be willing to show face to face. But hey, who am I to judge. There's quite a thread growing about the unfortunate Murder in Liverpool and comparing it to the murder that took place on a bus in London. Both ... no not both, ALL murders don't enter my psyche. Can you imagine stabbing someone, or sticking an axe in someone's head? No ... nor can I. I don't get it. Whether someone is black, white, marcian, atheist it makes no sense to me. That's why I surround myself with like minded people. Friends. I have views, but I mainly keep them to myself. There's no point in me antagonizing people just for the sake of it. I should stop laughing there shouldn't I.

Now hang on. Let's get back to normality. Big Bro. Kinga .. what a star. She's going to win. You know it, I know it ... even Craig knows it.

Oh well ... it's nearly time for Body Attack at the gym. If you haven't tried it do.

My tune of the day: Whatcha gonna do - Jon Cutler & Michael Watford

Judge and jury ...

It's quite funny how some people think that they will be judge and jury. You look one way, you are branded ... lok another you're typically labeled as one of them. If you say one thing, or use a phrase or saying you must be this or that, and then people who think they are better than you point it out. It's the same as being a Charlton fan. If you don't go to friendlies you don't care, you're not really a fan ... you are a johnny come lately, you come by Valley Express and you just buy the latest shirt, you never saw Morty play.

Well guess what ... I say sod off. Move down the bus please, but have you're ticket ready for viewing.

I had one of those outfits on at the weekend, a pastel yellow shirt, white boots, brown tweed jacket but still people want to judge. Me ... bothered ... whatever, loser.

I had one of them weekend. It never stopped but ended up going ever so quick. From the full english on Saturday morning through to a curry being ordered on Sunday evening. It was totally full on. The mock marriage of Trevor and Poppy, I say mock but I had to admit I wasn't really a clergy so I couldn't really do it, the drugs bust in Plaistow ... it was a weird one to say the least.

But the best thing, no football and no Big Brother. So I didn't see Kinga get thrust back in, up front next to Franny Jeffers.

My tune of the day: Deliver me - Michael Proctor